You’re Not Who You Think You Are—and That’s Ok.

Your Inner Critic is Standing Between You and Your Life.

Are you familiar with your “inner roommate?”  You know, the dweller inside your head who always has something to say, provides an overwhelming amount of unsolicited advice, and somehow wields enough power to dictate your feelings, emotions, and actions; otherwise known as the “inner critic.” For those of us aware of our relentless antagonist, we are intimately familiar with the struggle, often questioning if this inner voice is representative of who we really are—our “true” self.

I’ve spent much of my adult life trying to understand my inner critic. Why is she there? Why is she so critical and judgemental? Why does she always think of the worst possible scenarios?

And through all the work, I have realized that she is not me, I am me, and I give her power.

As renowned spiritual teacher and best-selling author, Michael Singer, states in his book The Unteathered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself:

“There is nothing more important to true growth than realizing that you are not the voice of the mind – you are the one who hears it.”

A mentor of mine asked me to start looking at my inner critic as a rebellious child that passes judgment out of fear, not rationality. And, like a child, needs to be reparented, which is the practice of giving yourself the discipline, attention and care you lacked in childhood. This shift in my perception and looking at my inner critic as a child desperately in need of direction has allowed me to regain control. When my inner critic starts getting out of hand, I simply think of it as a child acting out of turn and respond to it with a loving, but firm tone. This gives me the ability to not bend to the whims of tantrums, which is how I perceive the outbursts of my inner critic.

Controlling our inner critic and creating an inner dialogue of compassion and support is key to experiencing a different level of freedom in our lives. Just think about the possibilities if we moved through the fear our inner critic has instilled to take a chance on that passion project, writing that book, taking that trip, reaching out to that person, or whatever has been put on the shelf because our inner critic said so. Imagine the joy we’d feel!

Now, I want to be realistic. Regaining control of our inner critic is hard work and requires that thing that is so hard to attain and maintain: discipline. But, once in practice, it has the power to change lives. Yes it’s a challenge, but weighing that against a lifetime of facing barriers between me and the life I want? That’s a challenge I’m willing to take on.

As Michael Singer says, “…there are two ways you can live: you can devote your life to staying in your comfort zone, or you can work on your freedom.”

I choose freedom and I hope you do, too.

Article originally posted Here

It’s Not Too Late! Night of Lights OC Brightens Up the Holiday Season.

This year, getting into the holiday spirit may be a bit of a struggle. We miss our friends, family, and celebrating the holiday traditions that bring us all together. But even though these traditions are on hold at the moment, you can find the yuletide spirit at the Night of Lights OC, a drive-thru holiday light show at the Orange County Fair & Events Center.

My family attended, and the 40-minutes of family-friendly socially distanced fun gave us a good dose of that good ol’ holiday cheer!

Upon arrival, our vehicle was ushered into a lane according to our ticket* and guided by friendly attendants. I highly recommend tuning into the radio station as instructed by the signs you’ll see along the way. The festive Christmas soundtrack of holiday tunes will really put you in the mood—and may even get you singing along!

As we entered Toyland Carnival—the first of many themed holiday scenes—we were greeted by a lineup of toy soldiers and snow fairies on stilts. It was so festive and colorful that you could almost believe that the 1,000,000 lights featured throughout the event were all displayed here!

As we continued on the mile-long route, we came across a fun snow flurry with an adorable penguin waving us through, snow princesses elegantly waiving at us from elaborate icicle thrones, and Santa greeting us from his holiday adorned platform. Throughout the event, there are other special effects like bubbles and animated light shows, as well as humongous Christmas trees that make you feel as if you were in a scene of the Nutcracker!

For a fun, safe holiday event, I highly recommend attending. Families who may not be able to gather in person for safety reasons may consider caravanning to experience the fun together. The giggles and cheers I heard from the families and children in other cars—as well as my own—are confirmation that this event is kid-approved!

Night of Lights goes on through January 10. And if you’re looking to add a little flavor to your experience, you can preorder in-car holiday food treats like hot cocoa, cinnamon sugar donuts, Mom’s Bake Shoppe cookie buckets, and more before entering the event.

*Entry to the event is through online ticket purchases only at NightOfLightsOC.com. Entrance begins at 5 p.m. with time sessions available until 9:30 p.m. Limited reservations are available. Early Bird general admission starts at $39.99 per vehicle (up to five people) on select nights. Larger vehicle tickets (six to nine people) start at $59.99 on select nights.

Article originally posted HERE

History Proves Women Will Endure—and We Will.

I’d like to start this article with an honest and sincere question: “Ladies, how are you doing?”

As we upon the ninth month of the pandemic in the U.S., I ask this question truly concerned for the mental, emotional and physical well-being of women, who, as studies have shown, are disproportionately affected. If you’re reading this and are fortunate enough to say that you’ve not been directly affected, I kindly say to you, you are not excluded—all women are impacted, one way or another.

Though there are many ways in which times of crisis expose the vast gender inequality and imbalance in our society, here are a few of examples specific to our current situation. According to The Bureau of Labor Statistics, 55% of the 20.5 million workers who became unemployed in April were women, compared to 13% of men. Women make up 70% of the healthcare workforce and are being infected with Covid at higher rates, impacting their health and families. Working women are quitting their jobs to home school children at higher rates compared to men, impacting their income levels and careers well beyond the pandemic. And, the safety of women is at stake due to the rise in domestic violence cases in the U.S. and around the world.

I know, this is very discouraging. As if the challenges we battle on a regular day weren’t enough, a crisis, like this, has a way of handing us even more than we can possibly handle. But, as history has proven time and time again, women are extraordinarily resilient and have an innate power to channel challenge and despair into action and tangible change.

In honor of the three awareness holidays that take place annually in October that are important to me (National Domestic Violence Awareness, Hispanic Heritage Month, and National Book Month) I bring you this list of astounding women who have faced immense challenges and crisis head-on, in hopes that you find some inspiration in their stories, as I have.

• Erin Pizzey – Though she is still largely unknown, Erin holds a key role in the women’s movement. She opened the first women’s shelter, providing women refuge from violent relationships in England in 1971.

• Frida Khalo – Before becoming one of the most famous Latinas in history, Frida’s life is a story of strength, motivation and female ambition. After enduring a grueling accident that nearly took her life and caused her lifelong disability and pain, she continued to blaze the way for women during and beyond her time.

Frida Kahlo

• Ida B. Wells – Born into slavery, Ida became a prominent journalist and activist during her time, shedding light on the plight of African Americans in the South, advocating on behalf of women, and standing up in the face of sexism, racism and violence.

Ida B. Wells

• Sylvia Rivera – A Venezuelan, Puerto Rican transgender activist from New York, Sylvia was a leading voice, advocating on behalf of transgender people, drag queens, homeless queer youth, and others who were dismissed by the mainstream gay rights movements.

So, woman to woman, if you’re struggling, you’re not alone. As the women–who I’ve listed here, among countless others–have proven, we have the ability to overcome. Let us find strength and inspiration in their tenacity, as their ability to endure has changed history for the rest of us.

Article originally posted HERE

Coping with COVID-19: Your Mental Health Matters.

As we enter the month of May, many holidays we’d normally spend with friends and family may be relegated to, yet another, virtual gathering—or not even celebrated at all. However, there is an observance that we can’t afford to neglect this month: Mental Health Awareness. And, due to the unprecedented situation we’re in, the need is even greater now.

According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness, roughly 1 in 5 U.S. adults experience mental illness each year. If those numbers aren’t staggering enough, throw in the uncertainty, fear, and trauma of a global pandemic—and, you’ve got the makings of a greater mental health crisis. According to a recent study by the Kaiser Family Foundation, 45 percent of Americans feel that Coronavirus has negatively impacted their mental health. And, as the developments around COVID-19 continue to evolve, it is very likely that this percentage will continue to grow.

How to care for your mental health

There are many actions you can take to support your mental and emotional well-being; however, the first step is recognizing that everyone has different coping mechanisms—some negative and positive. Don’t constantly compare yourself to others who you may think have it all together. The goal for our own mental stability is to figure out what positive mechanisms suit us best—and, we should aim to do them often. It may be something such as picking up the phone to give an elderly neighbor a call to check in;  volunteering in your community; binge-watching your favorite show; relaxing and sleeping in; or, organizing that space, closet, or cupboard that you’ve been putting off for too long. Whatever it may be, it’s important that we practice behaviors that make us authentically feel good in a safe and secure way. And, another thing, it’s ok to turn off the news and put down social media from time to time. Overconsumption of a barrage of news can take a negative toll on our psychological and emotional health and we need to take caution in that.

Your mental health matters

Coronavirus and all its implications have upended our lives while putting overwhelming pressure on our ability to be nimble and adapt to new norms. And, our normal response to this type of situation—like any other natural or human-caused disaster—is anxiety and stress. We all experience these emotions to varying degrees; however, it’s important to understand that we don’t have to deal with it alone. Taking steps to preserve your mental health is critical in getting through this in a healthy emotional state and without long-term, damaging effects. During this time, put yourself first. Take action to care for yourself—your mental health matters.

If you or someone you know is in a crisis, there are resources you can reach out to for support. Visit the National Alliance on Mental Illness website for more information on what’s available in your community.

Article originally posted HERE

Three Reasons Why It’s Time to Retreat and Reconnect.

Throughout history, women have come together to support each other in an array of intimate facets of life, ranging from fertility cycles to emotional and physical healing. However, as society grew, we grew apart. The idea of individualism took over and caused a detrimental wedge among us that negatively impacts our ability to thrive and nurture our well-being. And as a result of this disconnection, we are left feeling depleted, overwhelmed and longing for reconnection.

As I write this, I can’t help but reflect on the fact that I am in exactly this state. I cannot remember the last time I was alone with myself and my thoughts. And like most women I know, it is not often that we get – or take- the opportunities to reconnect with ourselves and others, which is why, as I write this, I am simultaneously Googling wellness retreats for women. And, there are so many to choose from.

The recent surge in the female-driven wellness and self-care movement has reignited our natural inclination to unite and engage in restorative, healing practices and seek solace from the monotony of our daily lives. So, if you’ve been on the fence about booking that retreat, here are three reasons why you shouldn’t wait any longer:

1. We NEED time to rejuvenate – Whether we are parents, professionals, partners, friends, siblings or a combination of all of these, we tend to get overwhelmed with our obligations to others, leaving no time to replenish the energy we give.

2. We NEED to connect with other women – Sisterhood doesn’t have to be biological. Sisterhood represents a connection we establish with our fellow females. A retreat is a great way to meet and bond with women who are on the same, if not very similar path as you.3

3. We DESERVE it – We can always find reasons to neglect our self-care. If you have ever said “It’s too expensive,” “I have to take care of (partner, kids, parents, etc.),” “I just don’t have time,” “I’m so busy,” you have put yourself aside for far too long, and a getaway just may be what you need.

As we continue on our journey of self-care, I find it inevitable that a resurrection of the female connection to each other and ourselves will continue to emerge. Women of today cannot afford to keep-on-keeping-on the way we’ve been: overworked, overstressed, overlooked, overprescribed, and overwhelmed. We have no choice but to regain control over our health and well-being and reestablish our connection to other like-minded women.

Article originally posted HERE

New Age Diner In The Beverly Center: Easy’s.

Pork Belly Benedict

Self-described as “the twisted lovechild of Tupac and The Fonz,” the J. Fall Group’s newest concept, Easy’s, is a mix of contemporary Americana cuisine and iconic west coast swag – a millennial dream. 

Located at the sixth-floor entrance of the Beverly Center in Los Angeles, California, this fresh, fast-casual restaurant features a playful twist on traditional diner fare and classic cocktails. The walls are painted with graffiti-inspired art, and each table is equipped with a vintage View-Master® loaded with enticing images of menu items for your viewing pleasure. Upon arrival, guests are greeted by a friendly, energetic staff, stylishly dressed in leather moto jackets and all black ensembles.

Author’s child entertained by ‘View Master.’

The diverse menu offers something for everyone, including kids. Easy’s signature burger is made with a grass-fed ground beef patty, red onion, Easy’s secret sauce and American cheese on a brioche bun. The English Reuben melt is made with tender corned beef, large slices of dill pickles, black garlic, thousand island dressing and Swiss cheese on an English muffin. 

One of the most popular dishes on the menu – and understandably so, is the pork belly benedict (pictured above.) This dish re-interprets the classic eggs Benedict with an explosion of flavors, which includes mouthwatering maple braised pork belly perched on top of a soft English muffin topped with a perfectly poached egg and enhanced with pesto and BBQ hollandaise sauce. This dish is brimming with decadence.

Other menu items include elevated versions of salads, sandwiches and all-day breakfast dishes. They also have vegetarian options and marquee menu items which include Duck Parmesan and Fried Chicken N’ Funnel Cake.

Easy’s Doodle Wall

And being that this is Los Angeles, Easy’s features a fully stocked bar and creative cocktail menu. Drinks include boozy spiked milkshakes, and a Kimchi Bloody Mary made with Easy’s house-made bloody Mary mix, Chinese five-spice, kimchi and shiso leaves – it’s almost too pretty to drink.

Easy’s is family friendly and located on the sixth floor of the Beverly Center at 8500 Beverly Boulevard, Los Angeles, CA 90048. They are open Monday through Saturday from 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. and until 7 p.m. on Sunday.

Article originally posted HERE

Holiday Thrills At CHILL : Queen Mary Holiday Christmas Wonderland

A cultural Christmas winter wonderland has taken over the grounds of the World-Famous Queen Mary this holiday season, offering an entertaining array of wintertime activities, international cuisine and live entertainment for the entire family to enjoy.

Inspired by the largest ice adventure park in the world, CHILL is the only one in the United States and features international holiday-inspired activities from six countries and over 38,000 square feet of ice and lights galore. Guests can explore the park on ice skates by gliding through 1,200 feet of ice thoroughfares that zigzag throughout the event or by foot.

There are various exciting rides and attractions for adults and kids to enjoy including the Shanghai Speedway in China, where families can take to the ice on big wheels and race to the finish line; saddle up on the world’s largest rocking horse in Germany; and take a whirlwind ride on the illuminated Amsterdam bumper boats in Holland. For the more adventurous members of the family, there are a couple daring options such as speeding down Matterhorn Mountain, the two-story 145-foot ice slide and gliding 34 feet above the event on the 300-foot-long zip line.

Author’s Three-year-old son, Jackson.

The little ones can also partake in the merriments with a variety of exciting interactive activities such as creating their own stockings with help from Santa’s elves; gingerbread house making with Ginny Gingerbread, and meeting Santa himself at Claus Cabin!

For the foodie family, The Taste of CHILL passport offers an international mélange of seasonal-inspired food and drinks from every region for guests to experience, including savory Chinese dumplings, fresh-from-the-oven German apple strudel with Bavarian cream, and indulgent Dutch doughnuts and pancakes – a breakfast for dinner treat!

Other happenings also include a nightly tree lighting ceremony and spectacular light display, live entertainment and a fantastic firework show every Sunday night.

This event offers a fun and fulfilling experience for every member of the family and is the perfect holiday celebration for guests of all ages! 

CHILL is open daily from 4:30 p.m. – 11:00 p.m. from December 13th to January 7th at the ‘World-Famous Queen Mary’ in Long Beach, California. Buy tickets here.

Article originally posted HERE