Finding Peace in a Midst of Chaos.

As 2020 continues to test our emotional resilience, finding respite from the loneliness, anxiety, fear, uncertainty, guilt, and grief that overwhelms us on a daily basis may seem impossible. However, taking steps to preserve our sanity is proving to be more important now than ever before.

Our first approach to finding peace in chaos, may be to distract ourselves with a slew of activities— increased time on social media, online shopping, working out at home, baking, etc. And while those seem to do the trick in the short term, they often quickly lose their appeal and we’re left with searching once again. So, what if we took a different approach? Instead of distracting ourselves from the present, what if we immersed ourselves in it?

As defined by the Mayo Clinic, mindfulness is a form of meditation in which you focus on being intensely aware of what you’re sensing and feeling in the moment, without interpretation or judgment. While this may seem at first look to be contrary to our end goal—relief—the practice of mindfulness has been proven to provide us with just that.

Popular podcast host and mindfulness and meditation coach, Felipe Muñoz of Empathic Practice, a wellness clinic in Florida, shares some of his tips on how we can elevate ourselves during this stressful and unprecedented time.

• Mindfulness: Acknowledge what is happening in front of you that you can accept and realize the items that you can change.

• Perspective of Hope: Ask yourself “Can I change my perspective, my persistence and my patience?”

• Gratitude: Reflect on what you are grateful for each day.

• Building resilience – You are your greatest cheerleader and advocate! Remind yourself of your successes of the day. Be open and honest to yourself. Believe in yourself and keep your expectations realistic.

To view some of Felipe’s guided meditation, visit links: Meditation on Moving Through Loneliness and Angst, Anger, Anxiety, and Awakening

As we face a future that is shrouded in uncertainty, our emotional wellbeing should be our first priority. The first step is to equip ourselves with the tools we need to support us in times of upheaval and the benefit isn’t only personal, it also allows us to serve as an example for the others around us.

People who are facing a suicidal crisis or emotional distress can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at (800) 273-8255. More than 100 local crisis centers are a part of a national network working on this lifeline and are available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Article originally posted Here

Live Your Truth: Five Reasons Why the Truth Prevails.

We have all lied.

Studies show that Americans average around 11 lies per week. And, if you read this and say you don’t, well, that is a lie.

Now let’s be honest. We have all lied for different reasons. We have lied to save ourselves from the consequences of our actions. We have lied to those close to us for the sake of preserving their feelings. We have lied to be accepted by others. And, at some point, we have lied to mask our own truth.

We live in an age where at every turn we are inundated with falsehoods and deceitful information. Take social media for example. Instagram and Facebook feeds are pervaded with exaggerations and grandiose facades. These depictions aren’t truths, they are blatant misrepresentations. Yet, we willingly revel in and eat up the deceptions.

These examples get me thinking- does truth hold relevance and value against even the most elaborate lie?

Well, call me an optimist, but I’d like to think that truth holds value above all. Being truthful not only allows us to live a life of authenticity but can also help us live longer.

Research shows that telling the truth is not only good for our mental health but benefits our physical health as well. In a study by Anita E. Kelly, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of Notre Dame, participants were separated into two groups: the no-lie group and the control group. The no-lie group was asked to abstain from telling major and minor lies for ten weeks. At the conclusion of the study, Kelly found that the health of the no-lie group was significantly stronger than that of their counterparts.

Now, if the health implications aren’t enough of a reason, here are five additional reasons why the truth prevails:

1. Living life authentically allows you to get to know who you really are. In a society where we are expected to abide by and adhere to the rules of what we are supposed to be – it is the ultimate freedom.

2. Lies can only be sustained for so long. You never have to worry about being “discovered” or have the continuous pressure of keeping up a façade. You are who you are – and your enough.

3. You become a beacon for others who respect and value the truth. And those that don’t, oh well. You don’t want them in your orbit anyway.

4. You set an example for others who struggle to live truthfully, and that is not for the faint of heart. Living your truth requires strength, courage, vulnerability, and confidence –qualities that we all strive for, yet struggle to attain. However, living truthfully is a great start.

5. And finally, the truth is a conduit for love, respect, and empowerment. Living honestly enables you to fully love yourself and others with ease, earns respect from those you honor and cherish, and empowers us to cultivate a deeper relationship with yourself and others.

Embarking on living a life of truth does not happen overnight. It is a journey that requires the unraveling of lifelong conditioning, real commitment, and inner strength.

Will you receive negative responses from those around you for being truthful? Absolutely. Should that deter you from speaking and living your truth? Hell no.

Article originally posted HERE

The Five Friends You Keep Matter More Than You Think.

I recently had a conversation with a mentor of mine regarding friendships. I was expressing my concern about the difficulty of meeting new people in this phase of my life (late thirties) who share the same interests and who can inspire my creativity. She gave me some sound advice, and also said something that resonated with me.

“You’re an amalgamation of the five people you spend the most time with.” 

Really?? Then I must be a healthy combination of my toddler, teenager, mother, and husband. Which in retrospect, is pretty accurate assessment, even though that’s only four. 

However, this did inspire me to start thinking about my circle of friends, and how they impact my life in different ways.

According to the renowned motivational speaker, Jim Rohn, the five people we spend the most time with directly influence our self-perception, confidence, interests, hobbies, decision making and behavior. Your immediate surroundings affect many aspects of your life; therefore, a regular check-in and assessment on your squad is in order. 

Many of the friends we decide to keep in our lives for long, or short, periods of time vary on the purpose that they serve for us. In assessing your circle, here are five types of friends that play an essential role:

The Blunt One

Never one to mince words, she always speaks her mind and often says what everyone else is thinking…but wouldn’t dare say. The honesty you receive from this one is authentic, straightforward, and real. This friend typically stays around the longest because the trust runs deep. If you’re the type that can take criticism, then this is the friend you must have in your corner…if your skin is tough enough.

The Matriarch

Everyone calls her “mom” and may come off as having a Mother Theresa complex. She wants to serve as everyone’s conscious and maybe a bit of a downer; however, she is often sympathetic and whether you like it or not, the voice of reason.

The Go-Getter

She is regularly embarking on a new quest, whether it be taking a new class, traveling to some obscure place, or consistently adopting new hobbies. Complacency is not in her vocabulary. Nothing is too challenging; everything is a challenge accepted.

The Optimist

She is the “ray of sunshine” and can find the bright side of things, often to the point of annoyance. Despite, the fact that her infinite capacity for positivity can become downright annoying, you need to have a friend like this. They may be your only insight into what good is left in the world.

The Soul Searcher

When times are at their lowest, she is the one you call when you’re in need of a heart to heart. Life holds a deeper meaning for this friend, and shallowness is not an option. She is the one, who by proxy of her journey, is more than willing to bring you along for the ride.

So, to be more concise:

•    The blunt one will never lie to you

•    The matriarch will always take care of you

•    The go-getter will encourage you to challenge yourself and push your boundaries

•    The optimist will enable you to see the good in all

•    The soul searcher will help you discover your value

If you’ve already have these five friends (most of us do, without realizing it) keep them close.

Article originally posted HERE

Three Ways Smiling Can CHANGE Your Life

We all have those days. You know, those days where nothing seems to go right. You hit the snooze button a few more times than you’d expect, and wake up late. Already under the stress of running late for work, your toddler (for us parents out there) decides that, on this particular morning, they will do the exact opposite of everything you ask. Please get dressed? No. Please eat breakfast? I don’t wanna. Then when you’ve finally wrangled your toddler and managed to get out the door and into your car, halfway down the road, you realize you left your cell phone at home.

Yeah…those mornings!

Well, like every human being on the planet, we experience good days and bad days. However, on those bad days, the last thing we are thinking of is flashing our pearly whites at others who cross our paths. But, studies have shown, that smiling, even when forced, can trick our brains into thinking its happy and can boost our mood. And nowadays, who couldn’t use a little more happiness in their lives? I know I can!

The global spiritual leader and author Tich Nhat Hanh said: “Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.” This idea has been supported by spiritual leaders around the globe and supported by science for years. Studies have shown that there are significant social and biological benefits associated with the act of smiling. So, when you find yourself on the “moody train,” here are three reasons to crack that smile and change emotional course. 

1. A Happy Brain Relieves Pain: Even if you are genuinely in a bad mood, the simple act of smiling releases the “feel-good” neurotransmitters in your brain: dopamine, and endorphins. The release of these “happy” chemicals contribute to relaxation, lowered heart rate, and pain relief.

2. Smiling Signifies Self Confidence: Studies show that smiling directly affects how others treat and perceive you. When a person is smiling, they immediately come across as approachable, confident, and easy going. Even if you lack these personal feelings within, smiling can help convince you, and those around you, otherwise.

3. Smiling Helps You Stay Healthy: Studies have proven that large amounts of stress and manifested negative thought patterns create harmful chemical reactions in the body and that the act of smiling and laughing can boost the immune system. The act of laughing increases the body’s oxygen levels, therefore stimulating the heart and lungs, and causes the brain to release neuropeptides into the system which aid in the alleviation of potential illness

So, the next time you’re feeling down, take time out to binge on funny Youtube videos and screwball comedies, without guilt. It’s literally good for your health! 

SELF-CARE: YOUR QUALITY OF LIFE DEPENDS ON IT.

My female friends would attest that I am an advocate for self-care. I am a cheerleader, shouting affirmations like, get that massage! Take that class! Book that flight! I’m all about encouraging others to do things that instinctively make them feel good and contribute to a positive state of well-being. We all deserve that, right?

The idea of self-care is not new. Originally promoted by medical professionals as a means to inspire healthy behavior, the philosophy of self-care was explored and perpetuated by feminists and philosophers, including the renowned French philosopher Michel Foucault, who believed that care of self leads to ultimate freedom. After the 2016 election, the term experienced a robust renaissance (I wonder why?) and proliferated on social media. And as with most things, the gaining popularity opened the marketing floodgates. Google the term “self-care” and you will get over 1.19 billion hits. It’s no surprise that the self-care business is BIG, but is the constant barrage of comprehensive lists, tips, activities, products, diets, and beauty routines in the name of self-care really necessary? Search #selfcare on Instagram and images of impeccable manicures, cake, and bathtubs filled with fruit and rose petals are generated. 

How is cake justified as self-care?

With the resurgence of society’s obsession and over marketing of the self-care lifestyle, the essence of the practice has been diluted and the purpose submerged beneath the promotion of various products and services. What may be endorsed as self-care are really just ostensible activities that provide a superficial and often temporary state of well-being and neglect to really delve deep into what the true meaning of self-care really is.

Real self-care is done on a consistent basis and should not be limited to a biweekly mani/pedi or scheduled massage. But rather, time set aside every day to check in with our mind, heart and gut and bestow some love on ourselves. It is crucial to our physical and mental health that we are consistently aware of our feelings and emotions; recognizing what we are grateful for and what are we lacking; conscious of what we need and what can we give; identifying our thought and behavior patterns; and acknowledging what puts us at ease and what distresses us. We need time to get to know ourselves. Because really being aware of who we are as individuals, lends to the strength of our relationships and how we interact with others.

We all hold purpose in this world and abide by and adhere to the responsibilities of our various roles, whether they fall within the realm of partner, parent, professional, or offspring. Nonetheless, it can get damn exhausting, which is why we need to show up, touch base and allow ourselves a chance to recharge and replenish the energy that we emit on a regular basis.

Article originally posted HERE